On Our Terms

shutterstock_33771820We want all kinds of things, but we mostly want them on our terms. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but sometimes it does not work like that. And then when we don't get what we are after, we wonder why.

Examples include wanting to share and belong in a close relationship, but wanting things our way.

Or wanting to be spiritually awakened, but not being willing to meditate (or use other practice) to experience inner stillness. (Perhaps we thought reading Eckhart Tolle books would do it.)

Or wanting the excitement of a new experience, but then controlling the entire experience.

Again, we are free to approach these things anyway we want, we get to make the rules. But the way we approach them sometimes prevents the very thing we are after from happening. This is not an old school commentary of you have to pay the price. Intimacy, awareness, or discovery do not care if you follow the rules or not. There are not karma gods out there that grant these things if you have been dutiful. But these things do tend to happen when certain conditions are met.

Mostly we have to be willing to let go and get out of our comfort zone. Ironically, it is likely the freedom beyond our sense of control that we were seeking the in first place. So it's like we are seeking the freedom and excitement of letting go of control without be willing to let go of control. And then we wonder why it is not satisfying?

So moment by moment we have to pick. Do we choose freedom or control? Do we choose love or emotional safety? The outcomes of our previous experiences will answer which we chose in the past.

But here comes the next moment...

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