It's an NRAD

shutterstock_26794189-cropWhat's an NRAD? Not Really A Doorway (yes I made it up). It seemed like a doorway, but it didn't go anywhere. There wasn't much to say. Then it just kind of fizzled out altogether.

But don't worry, there will be another doorway shortly. And maybe it will actually go somewhere. Allowing things to unfold (rather than forcing things) requires opening doorways in order to create things. Doorways (and NRADs) can be people, opportunities, or experiences.

It is actually not that some doorways are not real. It is that we misperceived something to be a doorway that was not. Hence, not really a doorway.

Bart Anderson spoke of three feeling signals when we approach an experience:

1.     Drawn to- indicates this is a good place for you.

2.    Hesitation or resistance to (but not fear)- this is not a good place for you- get out.

3.    Ambivalence- there is nothing here for you to learn.

NRADs resemble the third of these. Since there is nothing more to learn from that experience, the doorway never opens and so nothing substantial takes place. So you are left there saying something like, “So, it sure is a nice evening-” mostly because there isn’t much to say. It may feel ambivalent, boring, and devoid of passion- like you are going through the motions. It is a little awkward- but no big deal. Find a way to excuse yourself and head onto the next doorway.

But don’t give up, because you often come across a few NRADs before you open a doorway that goes somewhere. Doorways are a numbers game. Open ten and find one that leads somewhere really cool.

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